Jenna’s journeying back to “Old Jenna,” who was aware that the grass isn’t always greener on the other side—you just happen to be able to smoke it. Apparently part of this journey involves spending time in Val’s office in her absence and wearing her fannypack? Sure, J. You do you. A distraught new student needs to talk to Val about a rumor scandal, but Val is still suspended. Jenna takes on the task of talking to her, deciding that “it couldn’t be any more inappropriate than if Val was sitting there herself.” Probably fair. Bailey introduces herself and explains that some douche from the basketball team has been telling everyone she had an orgy with him and his brother (which would have worse consequences for him, methinks). Jenna pledges to vouch for her and to be her friend.
Ming and Tamara accept Jenna’s return, but put her on probation—she’s not allowed to excessively talk, wear scarves, make weird faces during conversation pauses, or use mind-altering substances. After Ming notes the weirdness amongst the Asian mafia and Tamara laments her break up with Jake, the Devon/Matty breakup is revealed. Tamara dishes that Devon believes Matty isn’t over Jenna, giving Jenna some hope.
Elsewhere in the school, Ma Lacey’s being overrun with hypochondriac boys, while Val tries to dispense drive-by advice in disguise. Former student Hunter visits Hart’s class, only to be handed $14 to babysit his current students. Afterwards, Jenna catches up with Hunter to ask her how she passed the class. Turns out she didn’t—but she did find her voice and realized that if she really wanted something, she had to go after it. What Jenna takes from this is that she needs to invite herself to Matty’s party, which he takes in stride.
Due to her probation, Jenna is declared Designated Driver until Ming and Tamara say so. After arriving at the party, Jenna finds Matty to talk to him about his parents’ divorce, which happened during Jenna’s sanity sabbatical. Matty’s grateful for Jenna’s concern and expresses happiness at having her back with them, once again proving what a beautiful human being he is.
Over in Sadie’s corner, she’s having problems with Austin. After his initial chase, he backed off—as she said, “He’s more interested in hooking up my AppleTV than hooking up with me.” As in, he drags her into an empty bedroom to tell her about her new passwords. Dude. Sadie manages to point out that now would be the best time to hook up, and persuades him as such.
Jenna’s feeling pretty bouncy about everything when she runs into Hunter. Hunter tells Jenna that the party is great, but she keeps running into a bunch of boys she deflowered as a senior—though apparently one of them is looking fine. I thought it was super obvious who she was talking about, but clearly Jenna missed the clue boat and encourages her to go after what she wants. No one should be surprised when Jenna sees Hunter hooking up with Matty minutes later.
Jenna tries to leave, but Ming and Tamara aren’t having any of it. So, Old Jenna and New Jenna band together for the purpose of getting sloppy wasted. Drunk Jenna ends up kissing Jake, earning her a formal sit down with Jake and Tamara about her self-destructive, dickish behavior. Jake is irked by T’s handling of the situation and asks, “Why don’t you think I kissed her?” Tamara declares that it’s because he’s loyal, which leads him to his point: “Exactly. You’re not,” he says to her, going on to explain why her behavior during the presidential campaign was so hurtful. I mean, I agree with everything Jake is saying, but I’m not going to forget how condescending he was about Tamara’s campaign. Tamara apologizes and the two of them make-up-make-out while Jenna continues drinking.
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Sitting in the dark, Jenna laments how the New Jenna screwed over the Old Jenna, making everyone take part in an impromptu sleepover at Matty’s. Her mood is made all the worse when she sees a pantsless Hunter wearing Matty’s t-shirt walk out of his room. Armed with the knowledge that trying to go backwards won’t work, she cleans the entire house and bakes breakfast muffins as an apology, then ACTUALLY APOLOGIZES! Hallelujah. The morning is made brighter when Matty reveals that instead of “revisiting the past” with Hunter, he put her to bed after she got super drunk and vomited everywhere. She bailed before anyone woke up, which is fine because he’d rather spend time with “someone else.” Jenna gives a smile at that, but J, you should probably make sure he doesn’t mean Devon before you get all excited.
The episode closes with Val finally responding to Jenna’s extensive calls/texts with a voicemail: “Jenna, it’s Ms. Marks. It’s no longer appropriate for you to call me—I’ve been fired.” Dun dun duuuuuuun.
Next week: THE PROM! Also, there might be an opportunity to get Val’s job back.
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