It’s been a common mystery for centuries now. It’s caused constant debates. It’s a highly favored topic for any group discussion…
How do men think?
Thanks to Shawn Smith, the psychological mist that once separated men from women just got a little bit clearer. Smith delves into the world of men and uncovers for their female counterparts why exactly they think the way they do and do the things they do.
Before I even begin to dissect this book and share what I thought about it, I must put out a disclaimer. I’ve never reviewed a non-fiction book or a book that didn’t include something about teens or new adults. However, my motive for reading this book is probably the same reason any woman passing by it on the shelf would…out of plain, raw curiosity.
Now with that said, what I admired the most about the way Smith approached the topic was that he did it with an open mind. He constantly preached that men and women are different creatures. None is more superior to the other and just because men’s behaviour differs to that of women’s does not mean that they’re wrong. They’re just…different. At one point in the book he’d said: “I believe it’s most accurate and useful to think of men and women as different but equal, with strengths and weaknesses that are wonderfully, perfectly complementary”.
Smith also speaks about men’s insatiable need to please and be useful to women. He notes that women don’t always recognize when men are trying to show their love for them by being handy. Instead women interpret men’s effort as a way of distancing themselves from the relationship or a particularly difficult situation. Smith says that if the confusion isn’t cleared up soon, the relationship may plummet.
The talk about why men constantly strive to be “top dog” also came up. Smith noted that men have always been competitive and that the reason behind their constant need to compete is simply because status plays an important role to females. And, like previously mentioned, men care about what women think and strive to be as effective as possible to them. Smith also states that because of this a man’s “life can feel like a never-ending job interview”. It made me realize that most of the times society bases its view of emotional health and expression upon women’s perception of it. And it’s highly unfair and bias that men either live up to this expectation or suffer being classified as “insensitive”.
Other than these topics, Smith covers many more issues that reveal the real intentions of men and (hopefully) will aid women in at least slightly understanding why it is they choose the choices they do and to recognize that the opposite sex sometimes functions differently from them.
I also like the fact that for certain topics, Smith uses case studies and quotes psychologists so that he can come up with a feasible answer. Examples go a far way when trying to get a message across to one’s audience and I appreciate Smith’s approach.
Overall, Smith’s writes in such a relaxed tone that it makes for easy understanding and a leisurable read. So much so that I actually read the acknowledgments!
Publisher: New Harbinger Publications; 1 edition (February 2, 2014)
Length: 208 pages (Paperback)
Genre: Parenting & Families
Completed: February 2014